Should I apologize when I am not at fault?

apologies | disagreements | relationship | andwemet

“I love my partner. We have a regular fun relationship. However, when we argue and I am correct, I prove it so and expect an apology. Not getting one has me sulking for weeks.”

Sound familiar? Or does it go this way:

“I love my partner. We have a great relationship. However, in arguments where I am right, it is rare that an apology comes from the other side. I am the one who apologies to normalize things.”

All relationships have disagreements. However, not all disagreements end in the same way.

Some people agree to disagree in a healthy manner. Some let the ego creep into the fight and both sides sulk. Some fervently try to prove how they are correct, and the other is wrong. Some sulk because their partner refuses to apologise, and some apologies just to bring things to normalcy. Some also understand that their partner wants to apologise but just does not know how to so take the initiative to iron out things.

We ran a poll on andwemet Instagram asking couples how they go about defusing a tense situation in their relationships. We had over 500 voters of both genders. The results are here for you to see.

Here are the results we found — we are not suggesting a ‘correct’ and ‘wrong’ answer.

We would like to leave you with a thought. Whether you are right or wrong, there is no place for vindictiveness or spitefulness in a successful relationship; trying to belittle or shout down your partner does more harm than good. You are a team, and teammates should practice teamwork.

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Should I apologise when I am not at fault? was originally published in andwemet on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.