- responsible matchmaking - in conversation with the founder - responsible matchmaking - in conversation with the founder

The dynamics of a relationship is evolving where people are taking time to make a mark in their careers, travel, soul-search and then invest in looking for a partner. With age no longer being a barrier, couples are looking for a relationship that’s based on companionship, mutual understanding and partnership.

Maybe that’s why the modern day love story doesn’t really end with ‘…and they lived happily everafter’…. In fact, it starts with the first step of how they met.

Keeping these sensibilities in mind enters a global and a responsible matchmaking website for the urban Indians aged 30 years and above.

The Lifestyle Portal, in conversation with Shalini Singh, the Founder of andwemet about her vision for bringing back trust into online matchmaking for urban Indians.

We connected on a weekday evening and soon during the conversation, we realized that both are not just proud daughters of army officers but that our dads are from Bengal Sappers. Being from an armed forces background we discussed how it prepares us for the world instill a certain sense of responsibility, risk taking abilities and decision-making capabilities that also happen to be critical elements of being an entrepreneur. Sharing with you snippets of our tête-à-tête of Shalini’s entrepreneurial journey of being the first woman in India to launch a matchmaking platform.

How did it all begin?

After much coaxing by some friends, Shalini went online to a matchmaking platform where she was lucky to have met her partner on day three of signing up.

It was only when she met her partner in her early ’40s, did Shalini realize how being in a relationship opened up her world to evolve both emotionally and mentally as an individual. “I was happy and in control of my life but ever since I entered a relationship, I felt elated and hence I thought if I could experience this, why couldn’t someone else?”

She recalls, “With this new found life experience, I reached out to my single friends urging them to make an effort in seeking a partner. While friends from both genders agreed to the thought, apprehensions about going online with regards to profile authenticity and content held them back.”

A detailed search and a survey of personally speaking to over 1000 singles, cemented the idea that there was a gap in the market for those in the age group of 30–60 years, seeking a companion and which seeded the idea for

“ (Click here to sign up) was launched in early January 2019 and within 40 days we saw sign-ups from three continents, it was humbling to see a high three-digit figure in our verified member sign-up. Post the initial excitement of the launch we are now spending our time and energy in marketing the products to maximize the numbers of hits on the site,” adds Shalini.

andwemet takes pride in being a responsible non-intimidating matchmaking platform, which forces you to stop and contemplate before starting your search. Our 20 minutes detailed sign-up process that helps members think and contemplate on their expectations, thereby weeding out wastage of emotional energy which traditionally associated with online matchmaking.

Endless research and analysis

It was through experience and years of research that Shalini found out that people over the age of 30 have varied expectations from a relationship which may not necessarily transcend only to marriage, they were open to other forms of committed relationships and none of the contemporary sites offers this bouquet of options. Further, apprehensions of fake profiles were something which held them back from exploring and opening up.

During her surveys between the age group of 30 to 60 years of age, simple yet pertinent questions were asked such as to arrive at the offering of

“Amongst the many, one aspect which stood out during the exercise was an issue of trust with the platform. Shalini said she wanted to build something that the ‘first WhatsApp hello which implants the seed of emotional investment allow the members to know a bit more about each other vs just their name and the way they look.”

In fact, Shalini’s in-depth research also revealed that nearly all the online dating sites were focusing on a target audience within the 20 year age group. She firmly believes, “As we experience life our views on our needs and wants change from when we were in our 20 ’s. “ Hence it is safe to place as a platform that fits in perfectly for an audience who are seeking a meaningful relationship that allows them to set their expectations as realistically as possible and minimize the heartbreaks.

USP of

During our conversation, Shalini shares that though the Internet is a boon to connect and build relationships however, if abused, can be highly emotionally draining. It is said that 30–40% of the profiles in existing online matchmaking sites are fake which makes it a big hindrance to trust for those seeking to meet someone. Relationship as we know is a deep emotion, and is not about swiping right or left but being more responsible.

With a unique signup process, it allows members to ponder what they’re seeking from a relationship. andwemet (Click here to sign-up) enables its members to connect beyond physical appearances as it encourages them to bring to the fore relationship deal-breakers early in the conversation thereby bringing in the required transparency and avoiding subsequent heartaches.

Three reasons to opt for

Firstly, when you meet on an online dating site and connect, the outcome of the relationship is left to assumption. The assumptions last during the courtship period which can be for two weeks to a few months. It posts that you discuss life realities, in all probability both of you share a connection, but what if the expectations from the relationship are different it — can lead to heartbreak. This does not happen on andwemet (Click here to sign up) because relationship expectations are set up front.

Secondly, you state what is important to you. On the andwemet platform, it allows you to ask your own question, which in turn lets you know about the other person up front. It’s almost like a discussion. As a result, realistic expectations are set even before people meet through andwemet. Shalini mentioned how members are writing personal questions — some being — I have a hole in my heart, will that be fine for you / I am highly diabetic and on medications, but leading a regular life/ or member stated that their 12-year-old child will be living with them in case there is a connection.

Third, each profile on andwemet is verified for their First, Last name and DOB.

andwemet is a responsible platform, that adheres to global norms of safety and has people signing up from India, US, Hong Kong, Singapore and Malaysia.

Who knows, a mature and an understanding companionship is just a click away on responsible matchmaking — in conversation with the founder… was originally published in andwemet on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.